Where did I leave off? Oh, yes, the kick counts. Here I am, counting kicks nearly every hour, knowing good and well that kick counts are very difficult when there are TWO babies. But, I simply tried to rest assured when I would feel movement in just about all four corners and about 20 per hour.
Starting Friday I began to feel a significantly less amount of movement. But, I tried not to overreact. Then, my new routine of 4AM kick counts. And, still, less movement. Saturday morning, I was PRETTY convinced I should go on in for an ultrasound, but, again, didn't want to overreact. But, we went ahead.
After I arrived and the Dr. felt both heartbeats, I started feeling kind of silly. Like, all was going to be well and they would send me home to wait it out some more. I ALMOST said "let's just go. I'm sure it's nothing". But, I waited.
First Ultrasound: Jaxon was moving and grooving as usual. Not a budge from Jaden.
Second Ultrasound: same
Dr. Grover sent me to wait two hours, eat, then re-scan. So we waited. And, then...
Third Ultrasound: still nothing.
So, we went into the Doctor's office and her assistant said, "Dr. Grover wants to go ahead and take the babies." And. The. Tears. Fell. And Fell. And Fell.
We called the parents and told a few people and headed up to the room.
Oh, that room. The nurses were SO off their game. It was so chaotic. Things were falling, equipment wasn't working. They're monitoring only one baby and it was the WRONG baby! It was truly a disaster. And I'm thinking to myself, "Is this a joke???"
I knew right then and right there that God was asking me to trust SOLELY in HIM to the bitter end! And even knowing exactly what He was asking of me, and knowing that He COULD be trusted, I climbed onto that rolling bed and said one more time out loud "I'm SCARED!"
They rolled me into the Operating Theater (who ever knew it was called a Theater? I sure didn't. I mean, really, is this just a candid camera or something!;) And, they told Jason to stop at the door and we both shouted "NO!" Jason told them firmly, "Wherever you take my wife, I go!" So they stopped everything, sent him to change, sadly took his camera, and then we continued.
And, would you believe that the minute we rolled through that door, it was like everyone got serious! It was all the top notch best they had to offer in that room. And they were on point! I began to see that God had taken care of all the details.
That didn't stop me from having a hard time breathing... or from singing (mostly at the top of my lungs) for the entire surgery "The Lord is my Shepherd..." And I waited ever so impatiently to hear that first beautiful sound... Jaden's first cry! Then Jaxon's. Then to see them both ever so briefly before they rushed them off to NICU.
That surgery took close to 3 hours because of the extent of my placenta previa. And Dr. Grover worked her heart out making sure all was well before she went home.
I'm thankful now for that experience. That God left me feeling empty handed before He made His plan known.
We continued on quite the journey as we learned to deal with NICU staff and continue to learn to do so. But, God brought us through those moments and we have nothing but gratitude to offer back to Him....
and two really cute boys! ;)
Starting Friday I began to feel a significantly less amount of movement. But, I tried not to overreact. Then, my new routine of 4AM kick counts. And, still, less movement. Saturday morning, I was PRETTY convinced I should go on in for an ultrasound, but, again, didn't want to overreact. But, we went ahead.
After I arrived and the Dr. felt both heartbeats, I started feeling kind of silly. Like, all was going to be well and they would send me home to wait it out some more. I ALMOST said "let's just go. I'm sure it's nothing". But, I waited.
First Ultrasound: Jaxon was moving and grooving as usual. Not a budge from Jaden.
Second Ultrasound: same
Dr. Grover sent me to wait two hours, eat, then re-scan. So we waited. And, then...
Third Ultrasound: still nothing.
So, we went into the Doctor's office and her assistant said, "Dr. Grover wants to go ahead and take the babies." And. The. Tears. Fell. And Fell. And Fell.
We called the parents and told a few people and headed up to the room.
Oh, that room. The nurses were SO off their game. It was so chaotic. Things were falling, equipment wasn't working. They're monitoring only one baby and it was the WRONG baby! It was truly a disaster. And I'm thinking to myself, "Is this a joke???"
I knew right then and right there that God was asking me to trust SOLELY in HIM to the bitter end! And even knowing exactly what He was asking of me, and knowing that He COULD be trusted, I climbed onto that rolling bed and said one more time out loud "I'm SCARED!"
They rolled me into the Operating Theater (who ever knew it was called a Theater? I sure didn't. I mean, really, is this just a candid camera or something!;) And, they told Jason to stop at the door and we both shouted "NO!" Jason told them firmly, "Wherever you take my wife, I go!" So they stopped everything, sent him to change, sadly took his camera, and then we continued.
And, would you believe that the minute we rolled through that door, it was like everyone got serious! It was all the top notch best they had to offer in that room. And they were on point! I began to see that God had taken care of all the details.
That didn't stop me from having a hard time breathing... or from singing (mostly at the top of my lungs) for the entire surgery "The Lord is my Shepherd..." And I waited ever so impatiently to hear that first beautiful sound... Jaden's first cry! Then Jaxon's. Then to see them both ever so briefly before they rushed them off to NICU.
That surgery took close to 3 hours because of the extent of my placenta previa. And Dr. Grover worked her heart out making sure all was well before she went home.
I'm thankful now for that experience. That God left me feeling empty handed before He made His plan known.
We continued on quite the journey as we learned to deal with NICU staff and continue to learn to do so. But, God brought us through those moments and we have nothing but gratitude to offer back to Him....
and two really cute boys! ;)
-The 4 Cokes
You are brave. And we serve a mighty, mighty Father!! Love you.
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